Uncertainty. Shame. Disappointment. Fear. Do these words sound familiar? They are just a few of the emotions and feelings you may be experiencing after finding out you are pregnant. This is a difficult time and you are not alone in feeling like you are in the middle of a crisis. On the one hand, you may be thinking you have no choice but to get an abortion because of the effect it will have on your life and because you are worried about what others may think. While on the other hand, you may want to keep your baby but are afraid to tell the father, your family, or coworkers. Either way, you must be feeling immense pressure.

Take a deep breath and just pause. Allow your mind to slow its thoughts and focus on your breathing. Now, let’s talk about the first step—communication. Having someone to talk to during a crisis will help you keep a level head and keep your grounded. Find someone you trust who can offer sound advice and help you selflessly. Talk about your thoughts and feelings, and be honest. Your support person should be someone who can listen to you without judgement. If you don’t have someone like this in your life, or you just cannot bring yourself to talk to them, then visit one the many centers and clinics whose mission is to provide you with the help you need. Here, you will find caring and friendly people who want the best for you and have the resources to help guide you through your journey.

Communication can bring freedom from the turmoil you feel inside and the strength to keep moving forward. When you knock, doors will be opened to you, and you will find grace and beauty at the end of your journey.

So you just found out you are pregnant and you are keeping the baby. Awesome, and congratulations! The only drawback is that the father is someone you do not really know and you are unsure whether he is capable of being a father.  This is a tricky situation, but don’t be quick to take him out of the equation just yet.  For starters, if you haven’t already, you need to tell him that you are pregnant.  It is understandable if you made a mistake with this guy and you don’t want him in your life, let alone tell him that he is the father of your child. But he has a right to know that he is a father and he should be given the opportunity to reevaluate his life.  After all, that is his flesh and blood growing in your womb. Meet with him over coffee and give him the news.  If you are unsure about how to approach him, ask us to connect you with a resource center that can help you with coming up with the right words to say. We’d love to help!

If after you share the news and he says he doesn’t want to have anything to do with you or the baby, or demands you get an abortion, that’s okay. Stand firm in your decision to keep your baby and tell him that you are willing to give him time to process this news.  He may think it over and realize he wants to help.  In the meantime, visit your local pregnancy resource center and speak with a counselor who can help you plan for the next step.  Now, if he says he wants to stay in the picture—great! That’s awesome that he wants to step up to the plate and be a man! Now is the time to be honest with him about your reservations and give him a chance to address them. If he has a lot of things to do in order to gain your trust and confidence (i.e., getting a stable job, sobering up, correcting irresponsible behavior), then clearly communicate these things to him.  If he wants to get married or move in together and you don’t, then tell him.  Most men need women to be brutally honest with them to know exactly where they stand.  Beating around the bush will only make things worse down the road.  I have personally seen the least likely men completely turn themselves around when faced with similar situations such as yours. Becoming a new father brings out the best in men, especially when they tap into their natural instinct to protect and serve their families. Despite your fears, be open to letting your child’s father enter your life to support you on this new journey.  Children need their fathers in their lives and depriving them of the chance for this will only hurt them in the long run.  Don’t give up on your child’s father just yet.  Bring him to one of the local pregnancy resource centers where a counselor can educate him and help him grow into the man you and your child need.

Oh boy. You just found out you’re pregnant, but this time you’re not jumping for joy. Why? Because you already have young kids who suck the life out of you, and you and your husband are barely making ends meet. Or, you are at the top of your game at work and the only direction you are heading is up…until now. Not to mention what your friends are going say when they find out you’re pregnant again! You just can’t do this right now, right?

Wrong. You can! Do you know why? Because you are a woman, and women are strong! You have overcome many diverse situations and have adapted to different environments. Don’t let fear and the thought of what others may think blindside you into selling yourself short of what you can achieve in your wonderful life. A friend of mine and his wife just had twin girls, with five kids already at home! Crazy, right? When they found out they were pregnant, they were nervous. But when they found out they were having twins—they nearly passed out.  Talk about a fear of the unknown! Let me tell you, though—they are doing great. Yes, life at home is chaotic at times, but they love it. They have a ton of support from friends and family, but most importantly they have each other. They work as a team and get things done. Their others kids love the twins and help out as much as they can.

If you feel like you don’t have the support needed to get through another pregnancy and having another child at home, please visit a pregnancy resource center in your area. The caring staff are ready to help you through this next adventure. You have more than one option available to you during this time in your life. Can you imagine life without one of the children you already have at home? Won’t you feel the same way after your next child is born? Who knows, maybe this will be the kid who says no when the other siblings want to put you in a rest home later.

Becoming a father for the first time is an adventure. There are few things in life that are both exciting and scary at the same time, and fatherhood is no exception.  When I look back to when I became a father for the first time, there are many things I wish I had done differently. Parenting is an evolving craft and as time goes on you learn that there are always room to improve. Fathers, in particular, play a very important role in parenting and have a large impact on their children’s livelihood. For that reason, I came up with the following advice to help you along your journey.

  • DO: Ask your wife what she needs help with. Your wife will be exhausted after getting home from the hospital, and she may be up all night feeding the baby. She is going to need help with something, even if it’s getting a chore done around the house. Ask her what she wants or needs, and find out how you can help her with the baby. Little things go a long way for a sleep-deprived momma. Be her knight in shining armor!
  • DON’T: Complain. Seriously. Don’t even think about complaining about how tired you may be or about how much time your wife is spending with the baby. Your wife just endured hours of intense labor and is constantly feeding the baby. Do you think she likes to have a tiny human constantly attached to her chest (she does, to a certain extent), or to hardly get more than a couple hours of sleep at a time? Oh, you have a kink in your neck? That’s cute. Try pushing a human being through your body and see how your neck feels then. Trust me, any whining will not be well-received from your other half.
  • DO: Give massages. I learned that my wife has a lot of aches and pains after giving birth, and they get worse after sitting or lying in the same position while feeding the baby all day and night. Foot massages and shoulder rubs help relieve the pain and pressure, and they can be done while you’re both in bed or watching T.V. on the couch. Don’t wait for her to ask, just do it. These small gestures show that you are thinking about your other half and can help strengthen your bond. Now, don’t go into this thinking you’ll get a little something-something in return. Do it because you love her and want her to feel good. If you get something in return, then that’s just an added bonus, but it should never be your main objective.
  • DO: Make sure your wife gets plenty of rest. She will need time to heal and gain her strength back after the delivery, so do your part in helping her relax. Offer to take the baby out of the room so she can get a nap in. If she is breastfeeding the baby, have her pump so you will have a couple bottles to feed the baby with while your wife is resting. This one-on-one time with your baby is very important and it will improve your confidence in caring for the little one. It will also improve the bond you have with your child as well.
  • DON’T: Leave your other half alone all the time. You may be tempted to go out about your business as usual, but what you have to remember is that your family dynamic has changed. You can’t just go out with your buddies anytime you please, or take your wife to the movies like you used to. You have to account for the new baby and possibly for the fact that your wife has to stay on bedrest until she is fully healed. If your wife is taking time off of work for a while, or has decided to be a stay-at-home mom, she may begin to feel stir crazy. Your wife may feel even lonelier after you go back to work.  If your other half is like mine, she may not come forward and say she’s going stir crazy because she doesn’t want you to feel like she’s complaining. So make sure you are spending quality time with your wife, even if it’s curled up on the couch watching her favorite movie. Take her and the baby out, and offer to take the baby for a few hours so your wife can go out with her friends.
  • DO: Show your appreciation. Your wife is working hard caring for your little one and her new life as a mother will be filled with self-sacrifice and dedication. Share how much you appreciate how she takes care of your little family and how proud you are of the mother and wife she has become. Any hard-working person likes to hear how much they are appreciated, especially mothers. Their vocation is a selfless one and their families tend to forget how much they rely on the mother and wife. Make sure your wife knows how much you love her and how much you appreciate everything she does for you and your child.

I hope you found these tips helpful. If you need more information, please feel free to visit a pregnancy resource center near you!

Chances are you are on our website because you are looking for help with your pregnancy.  If your pregnancy was unplanned and you are afraid of what people may think, please talk to us.  We offer a safe environment where you will not be judged and looked down upon. We are glad you are here and are happy to help you.  The pregnancy centers we work with are ready to assist you in planning your future.  You will find compassionate people who understand your dilemma and want to help you make the best decision for you and your baby. Many women feel that abortion is the only answer to dealing with an unplanned pregnancy, but we are here to tell you that there are so many healthier options available to you!

My wife had a coworker who experienced a crisis pregnancy a few years ago. For her privacy I will call her Anne.  Anne came to my wife one day and told her that she was pregnant but was contemplating an abortion.  Anne explained that the father of her child was a guy she “hooked up” with and that he is not someone she wanted to have a child with.  On top of that, she had just started a new career in nursing and did not want the pregnancy to put her future on hold.  My wife and Anne spoke off and on for a few days, and discussed the option of making an adoption plan for her baby.  Anne did not want to go through the pregnancy only to give up her child.  She was convinced that abortion was the only option.  Anne was in a difficult situation, but thanks to the support she received from her family and people like my wife, she decided to keep her child. Anne realized that she was a strong woman who overcame many challenges in her life.  She also had the support of her friends and family, as well as the support of a local non-profit organization dedicated to supporting single mothers. Anne gave birth to healthy little boy and she is very happy. Whenever she sees my wife, she thanks her for the support she provided.  Now, she is a happy mother and a successful nurse surrounded by family and friends who love her.

Your pregnancy is not an obstacle, but rather an opportunity to bring a blessing into your life or into the lives of a family who cannot do so on their own. Do not sell yourself short of your potential and the ability to do something great.  What may seem like a frightening and despairing time in your life now, will soon be a time of joy.  Please give us a chance to talk with you about your options!

If you are like many women just finding out you are pregnant with your first child, you are experiencing a wealth of emotions and thoughts are racing through your mind. If you are like my wife when she found out she was pregnant with our first child, you are freaking out.  My wife’s pregnancy was a total surprise and she felt like she had messed up.  She was starting out in a new and exciting career and we had just gotten married a couple weeks earlier. We were not what you would say “ready to get pregnant”. We wanted to experience life as a newlywed couple and travel before we had kids.  Now we’re pregnant and our life has totally changed.

When my wife told me the news she was bawling her eyes out. She did not want to be pregnant and felt like it was her fault that our life plans were going to change. On top of that she thought I was going to be upset. But to her surprise I was ecstatic and was beside myself that I was a new father. Yes, the thought of not being able to travel whenever we wanted was a little disappointing, but looking back now we still can travel pretty much whenever we want and we are so happy to do so with our kids. As far as my wife’s work went, the pregnancy did not hamper her ability to flourish and move up. Maybe it took a bit longer to move up, but in the grand scheme of things that little bit was nothing compared to a lifetime of a career.

Fairly quickly my wife overcame her initial response and preparations for the new baby began. Baby and maternity clothes were piled high, the baby shower was planned and was a blast, and our new son came into our lives like a dream.  We were overwhelmed by the amount of love we had for our son and could not wait to welcome him home. We were so proud to bring our son home and begin life as a family together.  Suddenly, my wife and I were not living for ourselves, but for another human being that depended on us. Our life’s purpose became so much bigger than ourselves in the most beautiful way and we grew stronger as a couple.

You are not alone in feeling overwhelmed and scared after finding out you’re pregnant.  Even though your pregnancy is unexpected, it is truly a blessing. My wife laughs every time she looks back on that day she found out she was pregnant because she cannot imagine life without our son. Now, we have three more children with one on the way! Pregnancy is a beautiful thing and your body knows how to handle it. If you are worried about the resources, please visit one of our facilities.  You will never have to go through this alone!

I won’t begin to try to tell you how you must be feeling right now, because I am sure that is the last thing you want to hear. But what I will do is remind you of how strong you are. If you are in a crisis right now because you just found out you are pregnant, take a breath. All is well and you will get through this. No one can blame you for being scared or angry, or whatever, especially if this is an unplanned pregnancy. But before you decide on which steps to take next, consider this: there are worse situations you can be in. Think about it: you are alive, in front of a computer or smartphone, clothed, and you have resources available to you. How many women around the world can say the same about themselves?

Now, think about the history of women in our country and around the world.  You have come a long way and overcome so many obstacles during times when women were expected to remain silent. Think about the women in your life who beat the odds and succeeded when no one else believed in them.  Having a baby will not prevent you from reaching your goals. You have nine months to continue going to school, working on your career, or whatever else you are striving towards. Having an abortion, if you think about it, is telling yourself and the world that you are not strong enough to have a baby AND reach your goals. My sister was pregnant during law school and still graduated at the top of her class and passed the bar exam with flying colors. You can be pregnant and fulfill your dreams, too.

Now, maybe you are not ready to have a child regardless, or you got pregnant under less than desirable circumstances. I urge you to consider carrying your baby to full term and giving a family the chance to adopt your baby. There are countless couples in the world who are unable to conceive and would give anything to adopt your child. Please take them into consideration because they will be there to help you along the way. You are not alone in this pregnancy and you are STRONG enough to get through this.

First, I’d like to congratulate you on your pregnancy! A new baby is so exciting and becoming a parent is the most rewarding job out there! It is OK if you are scared and unsure of what the future holds, but let me assure you that it all gets so much better. Please also know that if you have a boyfriend who is upset about your pregnancy, both of you are not alone.  For a man, becoming a father comes with a load of responsibility and the thought of this is intimidating. But every man is equipped to be a good father, whether he knows it or not. Below are some ways to help your boyfriend prepare for fatherhood.

  1. Let him see the faith you have in him

For any new father, young or not so young, becoming a father for the first time can bring up a lot of thoughts and emotions.  Some men will doubt their ability to care for you and your baby, either financially or emotionally. Being a good parent and provider does not always come naturally, so it is important that you are patient and understanding with your boyfriend when he gets overwhelmed. Assure him that you trust him and believe he will be a great dad and provider. All men are wired to take care of others and protect their loved ones, even when it is unexpected.

  1. Help him find mentors

Your boyfriend can benefit greatly from spending time with guys that are fathers.  Help him find a support network of seasoned fathers who you know will serve as great mentors for your boyfriend. This is particularly important if your boyfriend’s own father is not someone he can turn to for help and guidance.

  1. Talk about marriage

I cannot speak for how both of you feel about getting married, but it is something to at least talk about.  Marriage makes sense when the two of you have a child together and it can make things easier in the long run. Your child deserves both parents to be present and in a home together, committed to raising a whole family.

  1. Communicate

One of the worst things you can do in your relationship is not talk to another openly and lovingly. Your lives have changed and there may be some bumps along the way. So talk about your frustrations and fears, and overcome them together. Men are naturally more physical beings and women are more emotional, so your boyfriend may take a while to learn how to communicate with you. Be patient and let him know that you will always be here for him. He will learn to do the same for you.

Like many young women in your situation, you are faced with a difficult decision to make.  You just found out you’re pregnant and you’re leaning towards an abortion for a number of reasons.  If one of these reasons is because you’re afraid of how your boyfriend (or husband) may react, hear me out.

Men, despite how they act or are often portrayed on television and in movies, have a deep innate nature to protect.  It goes back thousands of years to when men were cracking sabretooth tigers over the head with clubs! Our instincts tell us to fight or flee in adverse situations, and when loved ones are involved we go above and beyond to ensure they are protected.  Sure, there are cowards out there who selfishly jump ship first, but how often do you really see that?

What I am getting at here is to give your boyfriend a chance to see how he will react to the news of you being pregnant.  One of several things could happen: He’ll want you to get an abortion, he’ll walk away, or he will man up and stand by your side. If he goes for the latter, then you know what kind of man he is and can trust that he will protect you. If he goes for the other options, which is why you’re afraid in the first place, do not be discouraged. There are options to choose from that will benefit you tremendously.

The innate nature to protect does not lie solely with men (as a woman, I am sure you already know that).  Women were created with the abilities (and built in resources) to care for a child. Today you are faced with career and school responsibilities, and having a child is looked at as a barrier to achieving your goals.  Do not sell yourself short by having an abortion.  If you decide you cannot have a child right now, that’s OK. But you still have nine months to work and go to school, or care for the children you already have. There are couples out there who are unable to have children and would love to adopt a child into their family. You could allow them a chance to fulfill their dreams. I am certain you will be much happier with that decision.

You are not alone in this decision and will never be alone during your pregnancy, because we are here for you! You can also reach out to your family members and friends who believe in you and will support you.  Use our website to find a pregnancy center or clinic near you who will offer support and guidance throughout this difficult time. You will find that this unexpected pregnancy is really a blessing in disguise.

Each unplanned pregnancy is unique, and different pregnancy options appeal to different women. Some women take the abortion pill because they don’t want to undergo the abortion surgery, and so it comes across as the most appealing abortion. One aspect about the abortion pill that is not true for an abortion surgery is that it can be reversed!

How can I reverse the abortion pill?

Call it the abortion pill, chemical abortion, or RU-486. Whatever you call it, it is a two-part prescription.  First, a woman takes mifepristone, which blocks the effects of progesterone, preventing the growth of a healthy baby—and, ultimately, causing its death. About 24-48 hours after taking mifepristone, she takes misoprostol, which causes contractions that expel the remains of her unborn child from her body.

If a woman takes the first medicine and changes her mind about going through with the abortion, it may not be too late for her to stop the effects.  Abortion pill reversal is most successful when the process begins within 24 hours of a woman taking that first mifepristone pill—but it can succeed if reversal begins as much as 72 hours after that first pill. The antidote? Progesterone treatments throughout the first trimester.

We are always grateful to receive calls from women seeking help in reversing the abortion pill. It is gratifying to support a woman who has had a change of heart, and wants to give life to her child.

One such recent call came from a woman who had just taken the first pills to abort her baby. She immediately vomited, which concerned her—and she wondered what kind of physical symptoms she could expect when she took the next set of pills. That’s when she called Free Women’s Clinic Referral Service, asking for information on how the abortion pill works. Through the course of the conversation, our representative referred the client to the Abortion Pill Reversal Hotline. We later learned that the client not only called the hotline, but went on to receive progesterone treatments at a local pro-life clinic—an option she would not have known about without reaching out to us.

Abortion pill reversal is not fool-proof. Before the process can begin, an ultrasound confirms that the unborn child is still alive. Once treatments start, the reversal process has a 55 percent success rate. But a 55 percent chance at life is better than no chance at all. Women who have taken the abortion pill at least have an opportunity to reconsider their decisions—once a surgical abortion begins, on the other hand, there is no turning back.

Interested in learning more about abortion pill reversal? Click here.